Humans believe that love is beyond physical boundaries, so it drives dating to evolve throughout time. From traditional dating where men take the initiative slowly progressed to online dating, women can do vice versa. In relation to that, power imbalances stemmed from the norms and culture, which men and women tend to explore the potential challenges and how to manage it. When it comes to love, it doesn’t matter which ones will take the initiative, what matters is how they will navigate pursuing romantic commitments and how to make it last.
According to an interview with Coach Vee, a certified dating matchmaker, number of studies showed that men seek more casual flings than women. As time changes, the today’s trend shifts which more women now want casual flings than men.
Introducing online dating
As the era of technology innovates over time, dating brought major shifts in traditional dating which introduces a new trend ‘online dating.’ At the present times, there are several online dating applications that women are allowed to make the first move only if they are interested which allows them to choose. Among the apps are Bumble, Hinge, Tinder, and others commonly used by women nowadays. This was a challenge to not conform to the old rules of dating where men usually select their choices as part of rules of dating in the first place. Now, it is the women’s turn so let men wait to get a response.
Coach Vee stated that new online dating app features helps women to initiate conversation plus they get to pick whom they want to converse, so they feel more empowered and controlled. Meanwhile, it also aids men to alleviate their feelings called ‘rejection anxiety’: guys’ confidence increased after receiving an initiated response from females that leads to interactive conversations.
Finding love online
Moreover, Coach Vee gives one advice to those people who want to find relationships online dating: know where to risks and danger when it comes to interacting with you. Beneath that advice, avoid applying too many filtered photos, show bright smiles and write interesting in your bio like what makes you different from other people. These tips can help to boost attraction in online dating.
Meanwhile, an online serial dater Paola Navarette, 26, also narrated her experiences when it comes to searching for love online. The Bumble was the only dating application she used when she downloaded it in 2022. Later on, when she got into a relationship, she uninstalled the app. She only uses it when she is traveling solo or wanting to meet locals. Ever since, she knew how to be careful in selecting potential matches.
“By talking to men, I’ve realized I’ve become more assertive in dating situations. I know what I want, what I don’t want, and what I won’t put up with. If his behavior is unacceptable, I now have no issue walking away. I won’t lower my standards. If you can’t respect me, I will leave you where you are. I’ve learned how to spot red flags really fast,” Navarette explained.
Navigating their preferences allow women to establish their boundaries, study potential safety concerns and explore their needs. Since online dating has its own risks like women can be exposed to harassment, women have the power to protect themselves being assertive.
However, power dynamics are still visible in society although both genders continue to break the cycle. Previously, it was always men who decided what they wanted in the relationship. Because of the new features in online dating, women are ensured to have their voices be heard and advocate themselves for safety and well-being.
Same insights as Paola Navarette, she noticed there are a few downsides to using online dating applications. “Online dating often emphasizes looks or initial impressions, so it could potentially overshadow deeper connections and values,” she said.
Coming from a guy’s perspective, Sir Ronald Gayeta, a faculty member at a private university who also happened to be a serial online dater, 25, took up realizations when it came to online dating. He added, “When it comes to online dating, it changes your perspectives, if it’s not something for online relationships, if you’re looking for casual friendships it’s a chance for you to widen and broaden your perspectives around certain things.”
He added more insights, “Online dating changes you in a way you are as a person that is growing because this particular experience because no matter what you look for in dating app, there will always be changes within you. Good or bad, but you can possibly learn that from.”
How online dating shifted the perspectives of people on love
As stated by Faye Flancia, a psychologist, “Online dating changes how people see love and long-term relationships by shifting from natural, spontaneous meetings to a more structured, intentional way of finding a partner. In the past, many Filipinos believed in fate or ‘tadhana’—that love would come unexpectedly through mutual friends, work, or shared spaces. Now, dating apps make finding a match feel more like a personal choice, offering more options but also making relationships feel less organic. This can be empowering, especially for those who are shy or hesitant to make the first move. However, the convenience of online dating can also make people less patient, with some treating relationships like something easily replaced (or disposable) if things don’t go perfectly. While dating apps help start connections, lasting love still depends on building trust, commitment, and effort beyond the screen.”
When men and women receive high number of potential matches, it entirely affects them in different ways. “Women do get overwhelmed because of paradoxal choice. The more choices we have, the more we get in confusion, and the more women cannot find love immediately because they no longer thought that selecting their potential partner is important,” Coach Vee explained. “As for men’s ego when receiving potential matches, studies shown that men’s self-worth increased and tend to seek validation,” she added.
Online dating is a powerful space where women can explore their needs and preferences. Not anyone can find love through online dating though it depends on the person’s decisions whether they want serious or casual commitments. Fate can be tricky and full of surprises, knowing that there is the right time and place to find the right person for you. In the speed digital era, love is not something to rush on and get it instantly with a snap.
